Party in the ICC
(parody of Miley Cyrus' "Party in the USA")
By Matt Plotecher

I hopped off my mount in Icecrown's map
Stoked! Close to an aneurysm
Welcome to the land of level cap, (boo)
until "Cataclysm"

Just to be honest,
My last raid was Molten Core
Look to my right and I see Jania Proudmoore
This is all so crazy
Gear is all over 270!

My tummy's turnin' cause all the Scourge kinda smell sick
Too much pressure but I right-click
That's when the Vento chat turned on in my headphones
And the leader called our spots
And we skipped the story plots
And the leader said "More dots!"

So I get my buffs up
They're calling out "tank"
And the thunderclaps are set free
Tauntin' the shades like yeah
Pullin' the wraiths like yeah,
And I got my threat up,
They're focused on moi
The restro shaman's healin' me
Yeah, it's a party in the ICC
Yeah, it's a party in the ICC

Get to The Spire as DPS
Everybody's lookin' at me now
Like "Who's that bro, that's drawin' aggo?
He'll get killed like a Goldshire cow."

So hard with my guild not around me
It's definitely not a Outland party
Cause' all ore drops are saronite
What happened to adamantite?

Bone Storm is spinnin' and I'm bleedin' from that Coldflame
If we wipe now it'll be a shame
That's when Marrowgar dropped 2 Emblems of Frost
Now it's time for Deathwhisper
Then a Gunship Battle tour
Finishing with Deathbringer!

So I get Thottbot up
I'm searching my class
Also hittin' up WoWWiki
Readin' 'bout Rotface, yeah
Checkin' Festergut, yeah
And I got add-ons up
With my cooldown times
Tracking my threat will be easy
Yeah, it's a party in the ICC
Yeah, it's a party in the ICC

Feel like hoppin' in a PuG (like a thug)
Gather lots of loot to lug (bags are snug)
Something tells me it's worthwhile (in style)
As long as we don't get all wiped by Defile!

So I put my heals up
All on Dreamwalker
Here comes a Blistering Zombie
Floatin' through orbs like yeah (Emerald Vigor!)
Stackin' buffs up like yeah (Healin'!)
Now Sindragosa's up
Battle for survival
Damn Blistering Cold, time to flee (that damn icy grip)
Yeah (brr cold), it's a party in the ICC (ouch)
Yeah, it's a party in the ICC

And now there's the Lich King
Just chilling in his throne
But then summons Horrors with glee (and Drudge Ghouls)
Quakin' the floor like yeah (collasping the floor, yeah)
Plaguin' the raid like yeah (stacking us up like yeah)
And I got those DOTs on
of Plague and Infest
I hope we reach Phase 4 quickly (Where the hell is Terenas?)
Yeah, it's a party in the ICC
Yeah, it's a party in the ICC (Party in the ICC!)

Currently, the main news is the job. Things continue to be very difficult in terms of the administration side; nothing bad where people hate each other in the office, but just that all of the optimism and hope that was there when I first started is pretty much entirely gone. The real starting point of the spiral into suckiness is when a game project that we had lined up was “put on hold indefinitely,” and we never were able to recover from that. Now, we just have the one project, and it’s been nothing be an absolute nightmare in working with the client. The miscommunication is profound, and currently we are still owed 2 months worth of pay. We “should” have a paycheck next week, but beyond that, honestly, things don’t look good at all. After the Hell that was last year, it looks like I’m just going to be going through the whole thing yet again. Maybe this time I can work some of the contacts I made previously, but offhand, I fear that I’ll be starting from scratch all over again. What’s worse is that because of the lack of paychecks, I’ve already burned through any money that I had saved up from the first few months. The only good thing is that I might have made enough to get back on unemployed.

I have reached out to some of my former contacts with other companies, and will continue to do so. The trick is, as always, nothing is available right now, so I will need to wait for something to open up. I also will be looking at non game-design field jobs, again, in hopes that I can at least land something to pay the bills.

There were plans to move a couple of weeks ago — the idea was to move in with a couple of the guys from work, and the money that would be saved in rent, as well as the money that would be saved by selling the car, would have been substantial enough to make an instant difference in my budget. But, all of that is on hold (and apparently canceled), as the lack of the aforementioned paychecks makes it impossible for us to actually pay the cost of moving in the first place. Even though it would be far cheaper in the long run, nobody has the cash to make the initial move and cough up the money the first month rent, security deposit, moving costs, and possible realtor fee.

Now, technically, I could foot the bill of moving. I finally broke down and transferred money from my small CD to my checking account, so I would have enough to cover my share. The other guys, however, would not. Likewise, I could, theoretically, move into a place of my own, but the rent will then be much higher, and wash out most of the savings generated by selling the car. Still, I should look into it, I suppose, just to weigh my options, as it’s still better to be in the city than out of it.

On the dating front, I had the opportunity to date a lovely young girl who got along with me surprisingly well. Naturally, such happiness cannot be allowed to continue, so she’s going to Washington tomorrow for the entire month of August. Story of my life. Or, should I say, “SOML.” All the cool cats are doing the abbreviation thing. In any case, I am grateful for at least the dates that we have had; one should enjoy the sliver of sunshine that breaks through the overcast sky, not bemoan the brief existence of it.

Also, next week I shall be off for my annual pilgrimage to Wisconsin for the family bash. Ironically, however, on the actual day of the Bash, neither of my parents will be there. Mom will be taking TMG off to Michigan for a shin-dig her side of the family is having, and Dad is off on a canoe trip, which still totally blows my mind. Keep in mind that this is the man who never joined me on an Boy Scout camping trip, but a week-long canoe trip? No problem! I suspect that something else is at play, here, and my Dad is actually a top agent going on some classified mission to preserve peace and stability in the world. Makes perfect sense to me, anyway.

The bright spot in all this gloom is that I have a chance to really get back into one of my projects and start major work on it. I want to get some video work done, I have a number of game ideas, and even some drawings I want to tackle.

More later, I am sure.

My own thoughts on the matters are fairly simple:

1) No matter what, I felt good because he didn’t go to the Knicks, or the Nets, even. Apparently, there is some speculation that neither one was even considered to be a top choice. This was the most important thing for me, just because the amount of hubris and arrogance coming from NYC fans was absolutely galling; for 2 years whenever a basketball fan in this city said something about LBJ in free agency, they acted like it was a given — that the city alone, and not the fact that James would have to go to a very poor team and wait for another 3 years or so before even being considered a contender, was all that mattered. So, for me, it was nice to see that sense of entitlement shattered.

2) I said all along that wherever he goes, it’ll be where he thinks he has the best chance to win a ring, and to do so now. Certainly, with Wade, Bosh, and James on the same team, it looks more likely than it did in Cleveland. Of course, now, if fates should decree that he does not win a ring with Miami over the next three years, his legacy will be tarnished moreso than if he had stayed in Cleveland and not won. But hey — every Cleveland sports fan knows the truth: now that he is out of Cleveland, he’ll win the championship next year. That’s just the dark cloud that looms over our town.

3) Finally, this really shouldn’t surprise anyone. LBJ wore a Yankees cap to the Indians home playoff game. At the Browns home opener against Dallas, he hung out the whole time talking to the Cowboys. And growing up, he followed the Bulls, not the Cavs. Maybe Akron really is his home, but, outside of his contractual obligations,  he certainly never was a part of Cleveland sports.

I have not laughed this hard at a video in a long, long time. It’s 3 and half minutes, so you can definitely sneak it in between meetings.

It was late, and surprisingly hot for the evening, especially since I had figured that ha left all of the heat back in Florida. As I unlocked the door to my humble bedroom apartment, I was greeted with the stretch of putrid poultry and rotting pork.

Cripes, I thought, I could have sworn that I had cleaned out the fridge, and emptied the trash. Where was that smell coming from–

“Hello,” said The Bearer of Bad News.

“Oh,” I replied, as I felt my stomach tighten and intestines cramp. “It’s you.”

“In the decomposing flesh,” TBoBN cheerfully replied. “How was your trip?”

“Since you weren’t there,” I noted, “you should guess that it was really quite good. More relaxing than I realized.”

“Glad to hear it,” it said with a nod. “Maybe it’ll soften the sting.”

I merely grumbled in response as I dropped my luggage off on my bed and starting opening windows before the odor melted the glass.

“First of all,” it continued, following me around like a hellhound puppy, “you recall those Disney Trading Pins that you bought? The ones that cost about $50? Yeah, they’re gone. Lost like a tourist trying to navigate the West Village.”

“Swell.” I didn’t mean it, of course, but you can’t encourage The Bearer of Bad News. Not that it needs encouraging, really.

“Also, you know your fear about losing your job over vacation, like last year?”

“Kinda hard to forget,” I answered.

“Well, you still have your job, so rest easy on that part. But there’s been a major foul-up happening, not by any fault of the company, mind you, and your paycheck won’t be coming in for a while yet.”

I grunted. That one hurt.

“And just to top it off and show why you should never, ever, ever go on a vacation again, that one girl that you had a few dates with – you remember, the cute one that was a huge World of Warcraft fan – has decided to stop seeing you because you don’t have a living room set.”

There was a pause.

“Seriously?” I asked.

“Yeah,” it replied in a voice of uncertainly. “Honestly, man, I don’t quite get it either. I think it has something to do with the fact that you, as the modern day adventurer, do not look like someone who has all that stable of a career. And I mean, hey, given what I just told you, can you blame her? People don’t get involved in games to get rich.”

“Well, that’s all just spiffy,” I said sardonically. “Are you done now? I have pictures to transfer over to the computer.”

“Yeah, my work here is done,” it said cheerfully. “Oh, and before I forget: don’t use the bathroom for a while. I sort of cut a hole in the ozone when I was in there, if you get my drift.”

“Unfortunately, I do,” I said, fighting my gag reflex.

A snap of thunder, flash of deep red light, and the ending notes to “It’s a Small World” echoed through the apartment as The Bearer of Bad News vanished.

As always though, it’s going to take more than a bottle of Pine-Sol to get the stink out of my nose.

I took many, many pictures in many, many locations. This basically means that I will be spending many x4 hours uploading, balancing, and organizing them. But, hopefully it won’t take too long, and I will be able to post several on the blog.

Now, I need to work on catching up on a wide array of things, and thus shall be off. Onward!

For the 23 people on the planet who are not aware, LeBron James is currently a free agent. Lesser known outside of the NBA is that the Cavs are also looking for a new coach, who may or may not have LeBron as a player.

Terry Pluto has written a nice column about why the potential coach, Tom Izzo, should not be looking at the money when considering the job, and brings up a truism that I’m reminded off often in my line of work:

I once took a project for the money. But I made a list of all the non-financial reasons that I wanted to do it. The idea was to convince myself that I wasn’t doing it for the money.

It was self-deception.

The project also was a disaster. Because money was the ultimate bottom line, and my heart wasn’t in it. When challenges came, I wanted to bail out. I finished the job, but it wasn’t anywhere close to my best work.

I had a discussion with my mom last night about whether or not I had made the right choice with my current job, as opposed to the offer from the larger company, which would have paid more.

But in the end, everything else about my job is great: the people, the work, the working climate. As a small game company, money is always going to be a concern, and it’s something that I knew going in.

Of course, I suspect that I would have really liked the people and work at the other company, too, but I doubt that we’d be having nearly as merely discussions about Team Fortress 2, The Disney Afternoon, or why Captain America could totally take out Batman in a fight.

I also have started the beach volleyball league, which is definitely more causal than the basketball one. Some folks, truth be told, are still a wee bit too serious about it, but overall it’s definitely more relaxed. My v-ball skills aren’t quite up to snuff (the serves were less than graceful), but hopefully it catches up next week. Especially as we lost all three games the first night.

This post shall be short, and to be frank, the main reason for my silence the past couple of weeks has be due in large part to my rediscovering Team Fortress 2! I forgot how fun, well-balanced, and often hilarious it is. There are still people who are just too good to be real, but the flip-side is that since it is a team game, you can actually have those guys on our team as well, and recently it seems like my wins and losses have been a bit more balanced. I’m also looking at getting back into WoW, so it’s probably really good that I’m already signed up for beach volleyball, or I might have some issues getting out of the house.

I ran across this today, and it’s one of those cool graphics that basically puts things into perspective that deals with height/depth — I knew the Grand Canyon was deep, but not that deep.

And just why the heck do Sperm Whales have to dive that deep in the ocean? What secrets are they harboring down there? Someone should investigate!