Rangers' Cast (Parody of "Monster Rap" by Elvira) Lemme tell you about these two chipmunks Chip n' Dale -- they're not dancers, but they're hunks. In some fashionable clothes, roundin' up punks You won't catch them with their pants down -- they don't wear any! Chip's up with the brains of the pair Dale adds in with his chaos to spare And they both always have compassion to share Except with each other, naturally Gadget, now, she's an inventor She's mostly self taught -- she's her own mentor! All these proposals, fanboys have sent her Too bad she has such high standards.... She's a genius, a real hum-dinger! And a beauty from tail to finger 'Cept in her head thoughts don't always linger But I think that's why the guys fawn over her.... Rangers' Cast From the first to last Everybody loves Their detailed past Rangers' Cast Will forever last A decade later The fans are still massed Monty scarfs down all the cheese Just as friendly as you please Old Limburger won't make *him* sneeze Phew, Monty -- have a breath mint Don't miss the unobtrusive fly Zipper's an unobtrusive guy But he will cause obtrusive cries "Ouch! What bit me?" Rangers' Cast Is still growing fast From all the fanfics Each one is a blast Rangers' Cast Is so very vast All these characters And none are miscast Maybe there's a Ranger living inside of you and me And, yes, I do mean that in spirit, not physically! (Ewww!) Norton Nimnul Rat Capone Miss Lahwhinie, the Gadget clone Tammy and Bink Sir Colby Aliens Ditz and Steggy Hiram, the guardian mummy Fat Cat and his ample tummy They're all members from this show Running since ten years ago Mole and Meps and Wart and Snout Are what incompetence is all about! Queenie and Midge Canina La Furre The sultry Desiree D'Allure Irwina Allen's a tin ear Her music's quite a sin dear Foxglove's a bewitching bat Beware the razor-sharp claws of Gizmat The two short-order crooks are Fry and Spud Winifred's bad with Lou and Bud Cassandra takes on an eerie glow While Sewernose de Bergerac spoils the show! Muldoon, Kirby, Spinelli Flash the Wonder Dog and Darby Spree! Stan Blather reports on site Sparky and Buzz spark some light They're all partners in this team Making memorable scenes Until they return I shall dream, dream, dream, dream! Rangers' Cast From the first to last Everybody loves Their detailed past Rangers' Cast Will forever last A decade later The fans are still massed Rangers' Cast Is still growing fast From all the fanfics Each one is a blast Rangers' Cast Is so very vast All these characters And none are miscast [Repeat to fade] New lyrics [c] 1999 by Matt Plotecher